The great paradox of the writer’s life is how much time he spends alone trying to connect with other people. ~ Betsy Lerner
Thursday, 24th April 2008, 6:27pm

I do wear glasses sometimes

Which Wind in the Willows character are you?

this quiz was made by Auntie Krizu(:>)

Thanks to: PJ and Dr. Monkey. Leave comments (2)

Wednesday, 23rd April 2008, 7:33pm

Before you die

The other day I came across a post on Liane’s blog about a list of 1001 books which apparently must be read before we all die. I’ve only read 21 of those books so far, and only recognised the other ones which had been made into movies. The shame of it.

1001 books 1001 books

Thinking about it though, quite an industry has been created in the world of books and lifestyle television to extoll the importance of reading a certain 1001 books, of visiting 1001 particular places, of viewing 1001 paintings, etc. Obviously it wouldn’t be reasonable to expect someone to watch 1001 movies, but if someone were interested in doing so it would have to become their life’s work. No marriage could survive the pressure of visiting 1001 gardens or 1001 natural wonders; no normal career could accommodate such a task.

1001 movies 1001 movies 1001 movies

So are these books an impossible challenge or a burden? As we age will we look upon that hardback book on our coffee table and like the cliché says, regret all the things that we haven’t done? Will we really care that we haven’t swum with dolphins or read Ulysses?

Fly Fishing Book 1000 places journeys book 1001 paintings

Maybe I’m thinking too deeply about this issue, perhaps they are simply an easy way to experience those experiences vicariously. Instead of reading 1001 books, we can read or just dip into this single tome and feel more informed and enlightened. Instead of visiting Monét’s garden in Giverny, we can look at a double-paged spread of the Bridge over a Pool of Water Lilies, and express the notion that one day we’ll go there and see it for ourselves. Instead of going to the Louvre to see the Mona Lisa, we can admire her from oceans away (though I can confirm that it’s definitely not the same as seeing that little portrait in person).

100 birds 1001 albums walks to take101 things to buy

In addition to what we can do in person, we are able to enjoy a sort of virtual experiencing. We can imagine ourselves in any situation, in any place which has been recorded in ink or online. There may be a time when we may not need to leave our homes to explore the world via virtual reality. Imagine it; I could visit the Grand Canyon, while Becca from Chicago checks out the Tower of London. Sounds cool, but I prefer to give my passport an airing from time to time. Real experience may be limited, but it’s never limiting. It’s the usual message of quality over quantity.

100 things to do 300 beers 1001 gardens 1001 paintings
101 things to buy 1001 buildings 1001 historic sites 1001 natural wonders

I decided to search the Itunes shop for songs entitled Before you die, and came across the following song by a guy called Mr Moods. I listened to his album and ended up buying the whole thing, it’s a chilled-out mélange of trip-hop and hip-hop.

Thanks to: PJ, Liane Spicer, Nicholas, BlackMan, and China blue. Leave comments (6)

Tuesday, 22nd April 2008, 12:18am

I’m still here

Are you?

Thanks to: Dr. Monkey, PJ, John, China blue, Ian in hamburg, SamuraiFrog, and J.D.. Leave comments (8)

Saturday, 19th April 2008, 2:35pm

Daft Wear

I’m still thinking about the videos I posted here a few days ago. Not all of us have great bodies, a lack of inhibition, or the light skin necessary for this experience, but it does look like great fun. Or perhaps you’d like to take it outside, do it in your local club without having to show your naked torso and thighs?

Well I have the answer for you, in this tracksuit that I’ve designed, which features all the words from the Harder Faster Better Stronger song for your robotic enjoyment.

Optional fingerless gloves are also available. The tracksuit is available in any colour you desire, and once your order is received my team of skilled monkeys will create the dancesuit of your dreams.

I’ve found another video of a couple of sexy ladies performing their own version of the dance. Loads of the youtube commenters have been very rude about the ladies weight, but anyone can see that they aren’t overweight, they’re just normal-sized women. It’s a shame that we’re so used to seeing size zero women in the media that the average woman looks huge in comparison.

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Wednesday, 16th April 2008, 1:45am

The Spice is Right

Your Score: Coriander

You scored 50% intoxication, 50% hotness, 50% complexity, and 100% craziness!

You are Coriander!

You’re subtle. So subtle that people often forget about you. You are refreshingly clean and rather odd. You’re often misunderstood. Your key word is “latent”; all your potential is wrapped up tightly until “BOOM,” one day you’re cilantro. Funky.

The Which Spice Are You Test

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Monday, 14th April 2008, 11:57pm

Truth Hurts

Crime SceneI almost can’t believe what I said to my friend Miguel this evening.

I basically told him that I felt like he was always wanting something from me, and that I was feeling used by him. I said that I didn’t think he was consciously doing it (to give him the benefit of the doubt) but I wasn’t happy with how things had been going in the past few months. He seemed to take it quite well.

Why did I say this to him? Well it has been festering in me for a while. At first I helped him out and didn’t say anything to him despite my annoyance, then I tried to avoid him (which was hard when he visited me at work if I didn’t answer my phone), then more recently I’ve been giving excuses, but he would try to talk his way around them.

For instance, last Friday after not contacting me for two weeks he calls me, seemingly for a catchup. When I mention that I’m not working this week he says that I can help him to conduct some research. I replied that I didn’t want to commit myself to anything, and I needed a break and wanted to go abroad if at all possible. I suggested that he ask another friend of his, and he informed me that she had told him to ask me (she must think I’m an idiot)! I should have just been frank with him and said that I didn’t want to do it, as he doesn’t take hints.

So what pushed me over the edge this evening? Well he called me to check whether I could do his research, and I said the same as before. He asked me to call him back and I told him (truthfully) that I had no credit left. Then he asked me if my email address was the same as before, and when I confirmed it he said that he wanted to send me something to work on! I just snapped.

I guess the way he acts in the next few weeks will reveal whether our friendship will last much longer. It would be a shame for a ten-year friendship to end, but I can’t tolerate his demands anymore.

Thanks to: PJ, Liane Spicer, BlackMan, and BlackMan. Leave comments (5)

Monday, 14th April 2008, 6:21pm

Freedom

Holiday

I’m not due back to work for a week. Ideally I would have liked to disappear somewhere for a few days, and I should be getting paid tomorrow, so we’ll see what I can manage.

I’m so glad to not be at work, my colleague is really getting on my nerves right now. She keeps on trying to manipulate me into supporting her mission against the rest of the organisation. When I express my own opinion on things she becomes patronising and rude, and I can’t stand it anymore. I just want to do my work and go home.

My phone alarm woke me up at 7.15 as I’d forgotten to turn it off. Then the postman woke me up at 10.30 to sign for a letter. I think I scared him with my hideous appearance; I’m not a morning person and I probably look like a real hag before noon.

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Sunday, 13th April 2008, 9:20pm

News and Views

Cloud overheadThe weather’s even more bizarre than usual over here in Blighty; a week ago it was snowing, then it was rather mild all week, then this afternoon it rained heavily. I decided to go for a walk when the rain seemed to be dying down, but a few minutes later I found myself in the middle of a hailstorm, and became unreasonably worried that one of those huge mutant hailstones would fall on my head and knock me out. Luckily it eased after another couple of minutes.

Carla BruniFrance’s First Lady, Carla Bruni, is apparently upset about the reappearance of some nude pics she modelled for during her modelling career. I don’t think she should be embarrassed at all; what’s done is done, and she looks amazing. Sure, it’s probably not totally appropriate for her current position as Mrs Sarkozy, but you have to own your actions, and posing nude, like having a tattoo, is something you may have to live with for the rest of your life.

Benefits Supervisor Sleeping, by Lucien Freud

I don’t mean to be disrespectful, but if I were the subject of the Lucien Freud’s painting, Benefits Supervisor Sleeping, 1995, I would not be proud at all, never mind that it’s expected to become the most expensive picture by a living artist ever sold. Actually the subject doesn’t look half as bad in reality as he made her look in the painting, but I guess that’s art for you.

Shakira

There’s a rumour going around that Shakira was involved in a ménage à trois on a yacht with her boyfriend Antonio de la Rúa and singer Alejandro Sanz, which was captured on videotape… Shakira denies the whole thing, but if it were true I’d be very proud of her. Hetero men are always going on about their fantasy of having a threesome with a couple of women, basically because they love the idea of being able to satisfy two women at once, and that both women would lavish their attention on them. The thought of sharing a woman with another bloke repels them not just due to the possible bisexual connotations, but because of the competition factor. If Shakira was able to convince two apparently hetero guys to service her every wish, and then record it for posterity, then all power to her!

Naomi Campbell Naomi Campbell

After being banned by British Airways and arrested for acting like a complete knob, Naomi Campbell insists that she was mistreated because she’s black. No darling, you were punished for disrupting a flight, spitting on a cop and abusing crew members. You weren’t the only one to have been inconvenienced by the chaos at Heathrow Terminal 5, but I’m pretty sure that you’re the only one who made such a complete fool of yourself. Unlike most people whose suitcases went missing during the chaos, you can afford to replace every single item without a problem. The chances are that your suitcase will turn up eventually, but in any case there’s no excuse for attacking people in the way that you did. You need to sort out that anger of yours before you kill someone else or yourself.

For Sale Sign

It looks like I might be staying with my parents for a while longer. The Bank of England cut interests rates by a quarter this week, but in reality it’s not going to mean much to those with mortgages as the global banking crisis and the threat of recession continue to hold our banks by the balls. Banks are becoming much stricter on people applying for mortgages, so you’d be hard-pressed to find a 100% mortgage anywhere now, and a sizeable deposit is also necessary for any chance of getting finance for a home. It does look like house prices are starting to decrease now, though it was inevitable really as first-time buyers were being priced out of the market. While the average salary in London is £25,000-35,000, the average home is about ten times higher, making it impossible for the average person to afford their own home.

Aria Giovanni

The electric guitar I won arrived a couple of days ago, but we’re not hitting it off totally. I think it needs new strings but I’m not bothered enough to even replace them. I wouldn’t mind having a nice electro-acoustic number, but I don’t think this one is really me. It was fun to try it out though, and even my dad had a go with it earlier. I’ll probably put it on ebay in a few days, or if you’d like an electric guitar with all the fixings (apart from an amp) and you’re in the UK (preferably), feel free to contact me.

Thanks to: Dr. Monkey. Leave comments (1)

Sunday, 13th April 2008, 12:56am

Harder Better Faster Stronger Dafter

Oh my, this video has it all. I prefer it to the original one with the girls, if only because the guys don’t stand still.

(via Electro Plankton)

Update: just discovered that my favourite guy from the above video also did a solo version:

Now, that’s talent. :twisted:

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Saturday, 12th April 2008, 2:10am

Hello, Joe

Why don’t you make a move, Joe? (Not you.)

Flashbacks of a Fool: When an ageing movie star returns home for a friend’s funeral he faces his youthful dreams, and a nightmare he’ll do anything to forget. Judging from the trailer this film will be a sensuous and thoughtful exploration of young love and its consequences.

With still over 200 days left until Bond 22, Daniel Craig makes sure that I am not left bereft without him for too long. Plus he appears to be quite nude in at least one scene… :mrgreen:

Flashbacks of a Fool Poster

Thanks to: PJ and J.D.. Leave comments (2)

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